P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
