kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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