she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
