Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I just cut my nipple shaving
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize