Do vagina's smell?
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk