No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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