Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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