do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
