I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
