Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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