Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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