he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
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