i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
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