his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
