The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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