hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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