yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
