dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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