I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize