At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
