Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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