I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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