You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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