Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
