I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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