i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
worst night to have a conscience
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
