Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
