She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize