Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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