I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
