is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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