I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
We are all done wearing pants today
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Randomize
