it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
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Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
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Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID