Texts From Last Night

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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  I can't open my eyes

  (925): View more from California

  Lol why not?

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk

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  (808) I can't open my eyes (925) Lol why not? (808) Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk http://tfl.nu/5iv9
  Replies (4) Good night (1183) Bad night (1353)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!

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  (503): I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!! http://tfl.nu/reo6
  Replies (25) Good night (3270) Bad night (874)
• Favorite

  (317): View more from Indiana

  just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.

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  (317): just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude. http://tfl.nu/5gs4
  Replies (33) Good night (4094) Bad night (2605)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.

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  (216): There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself. http://tfl.nu/jj9y
  Replies (23) Good night (1261) Bad night (4047)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest

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  (937): the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest http://tfl.nu/2mrs
  Replies (37) Good night (5465) Bad night (1122)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee

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  (917): Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee http://tfl.nu/mgtx
  Replies (8) Good night (5113) Bad night (915)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.

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  (805): You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street. http://tfl.nu/uxg0
  Replies (15) Good night (6924) Bad night (2284)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.

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  (614): This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old. http://tfl.nu/nedp
  Replies (105) Good night (2066) Bad night (5871)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times

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  (706): He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times http://tfl.nu/wnel
  Replies (12) Good night (8914) Bad night (1819)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.

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  (419): I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned. http://tfl.nu/xmxl
  Replies (10) Good night (2657) Bad night (807)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack

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  (307): FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack http://tfl.nu/bu27
  Replies (2) Good night (757) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.

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  (347): I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick. http://tfl.nu/dk06
  Replies (6) Good night (1262) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.

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  (724): Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is. http://tfl.nu/p6ee
  Replies (1) Good night (606) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"

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  (248): I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring" http://tfl.nu/0ibn
  Replies (3) Good night (896) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"

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  (604): I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating" http://tfl.nu/q7vf
  Replies (0) Good night (288) Bad night (333)

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