hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
she smelled like a LAN party
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
