So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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