if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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