Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
