we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
