How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
