We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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