i wish peter jackson would direct porn
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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