I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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