its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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