There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
