I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
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