Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Randomize