Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
My pussy is not your playground.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize