He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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