Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
