I will die if light touches me.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
