I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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